Thursday, February 4, 2010


Back when I was a playful 8 year old,Back whenI remember the pain that I saw on your face when I hurt myself falling down..I

  • I remember the money that u gave me secretly for eating ice candies..
  • I remember the way u protected me from dad's anger when I broke the brand new television set that was expensive..
  • I remember the way u fought with me for the television remote to see the daily serials when I was watching cartoons..
  • I remember the warmth of hiding under your rug when I got less marks and u lied to dad that I was sleeping..
  • I remember the way u forgived me when I raised my arm and bet u..
  • I remember the way you poured excess of ghee into dal saying that my wife would leave me if I dont eat ghee..
  • I remember how safe I felt when u were around me..
  • I remember the happiness in your eyes when I told you about my success in tenth std board examinations..
  • I remember the way u boasted about my talents to the neighbors around the home..
  • I remember the excellent taste of the pickles that u made..
  • I remember the way you praised me for my dancing skills..
  • I remember how u consoled me when I flunked badly in my intermediate course..
  • I remember the way u kept pestering me to eat food when I was talking on phone for hours together..
  • I remember the fear in your eyes when u advised me not to go deep into spirituality..
  • I remember how u joked at me asking whether I would marry a tamil or telugu gurl.
  • I remember how u faced the change of phase in life so boldly..
  • I remember how u pretended to be alright even though u weren't at the best of your health..
  • I remember how u tried to give the best for us even though u were experiencing pain..
  • I remember how boldly u faced the pain of spilling blood when I was worried that no-one was at home..
  • I remember how ur heart was getting weakened..
  • I remember the pain that ur body felt when u were given very high dosage of medicines..
  • I remember the pain that u felt when the doctors pierced the needle in ur neck unable to catch a nerve in the hand..
  • I remember ur helpless state when u asked me to sit beside u, holding my hand tight..
  • I remember the pain that I felt when u asked me whether u would go to heaven or hell..
  • I remember the helpless fear of death in ur eyes..
  • I remember the last words u said to me,"Listen to what mom and dad say..Go after life and hunt for what u want..U should become famous and do remember ur granny"..

My dear granny!!..I wonder in which world you are..My eyes are wet..I wish u can listen to my silent scream..I MISS U AND I LOVE U TONNES

MY FIRST LOVE.............

Sometimes when I think about that golden period,
around a decade back, when I was just a hebetudinous idiot.
In class 7th I was, just engrossed in books
love and romance, far away from their hooks.

Then in my class, came this ravishing girl,
mesmerized everyone like a scintillating pearl.
Her every svelte move amassed enormous attention.
My word!!! She was like heaven's priceless possession.

Soon she got the deserved "celebrity" stardom,
Flattering bozos trying hard to make an impression.
For a guy like me who was just a face in the crowd
she simply seems to be out of destination.

Then one day, she came to my seat
asked me…if I am not wrong, Are you ronack?
Flying high, I replied YES
asked my fellow, has sun rose from the west?

She continued, can u lend me your history sheets
but, I didn’t listen what she speaks
her brown hazel eyes had done the trick
alluring, sensual with a touch of mischief.

Yes, sure, sure yes..I stammered like hell,
can’t help...she was the princess of damsel.
Every other guy was jealous cum horrified,
what plot did this jerk has employed.

Geez!!I had a big crush on that bonny beauty
childhood love, they are pure, free from treachery
can’t forget those maiden sleepless nights
still, must confess, it was like a memorable misery.

Time played a role and so did the fate.
Her dad posted then to a different place
years we didn’t talked we didn’t nattered
my binding crush, finally tattered.

Then few years later, I did manage a call
her voice hypnotized me like a Christmas snowfall
blushed, she revealed without a clue
trust me Ronack, I HAD a crush on you


I was walking down an abandoned street..The street was rugged and showed no traces of human presence..It was dusty and seemed to be untouched for a long time..In fact I wondered if it existed in reality..As I carefully laid steps on the rugged path, I suddenly tripped over something that I thought to be a stone..I took a closer look at what it was..I was baffled when I saw its true shape after dusting it..It was a lamp that was studded with precious stones that glittered like gold..A voice within me suggested to swipe it..I acted as per instinct and did so..I was spell bound to see a gigantic figure in front of me..I wondered, Was this really a genie or was I dreaming about Aladdin??..I asked the mystic fellow, "Are you the genie in the lamp??"..He replied, "Yes my lord!!..Make a wish and it shall be fulfilled"..Oh my gosh wtf is this..I replied,"Okay, fine Mr.genie..Take me into my past, Then I shall believe your words".."Your wish is my command", the genie said and asked me to shut my eyes..

I did so and opened my eyes after a minute ..Surprisingly, I was looking at myself when I was just nine..I time travelled to an incident that happened in my 4th std..A bull sized classmate of mine called Koushik was bullying me..He wished to test his strength,So he started kicking me with his brand new bata shoes..A patient-me tolerated his rupture until a girl in my class giggled, looking at him like an action hero and looking at me like a chamcha to a villian..Unexpectedly, there was an adrenaline rush..In a split second, I gave a hard punch on his face with my puny fist just like how Popeye beats Bluto after eating spinach..and moved aside staring at the girl with I should have convinced her that it is the heroes who get beaten by the villian first..:)

Beep beep..The scene changed..I was drifted back into the time when I was 13..I was playing carroms with my dad..We were playing best of five match..I lost the first..I lost the second..Finally I lost third game too..I was looking at my 13 yr old self loosing cool for losing the game..I pushed the board aside, threw the coins away and started yelling at my dad, "Dad!! I dont care if you are the one who taught me carroms, I dont even care that you are my loving dad..What matters is you are my opponent..Losing to an opponent is like dying with shame.." I screamed and went into my room..Oh my gosh..What the f*** did I speak..I was seeing all my past happening..Anger always makes me behave like an animal..Before I could say sorry to dad, the scene faded..

Now, I was looking at my 17 yr old self..I was travelling home from college in a metro liner..It was 11.00 am sharp and I got a phone call..Talking on the phone, I got down the bus and started moving towards home..Finally, I reached home at 11.40 after keeping snail's pace..My granny asked me if I was hungry..I said,"ila ila(no no) I am busy"..The clocked then showed 12.45..I was still on phone and my granny asked me again for lunch..The blabbering continued..Finally, my granny lovably scolded me at 3.30 for not having lunch..I cut the call and told,"My dear lovely granny!!..I am preparing for IIT you know..There are lot of things to be discussed on phone dear.."Poor thing..Such a lovable granny she was..She believed what I said..For atleast a minute longer I wished to see my deceased granny again..Even before I could complete the wish..The scene faded..

Now I was expecting for an other scene from my past but to my surprise I gotta kick on my butt from my friend..He politely said, "Wake up lazy bones!!..cut off your f***ing day dream..We have a lab to attend.."